God speaks

I was at church today. It was really good. There's something I realized about myself a long time ago and that's that I cannot be away from God for any period of time. I always come back. I always become so extremely desperate because truly, nothing else satisfies. I have tried. It doesn't work. "This world has nothing for me, I will follow you." I mean the first the part. The second part is hard. But I'm trying.

One of my good friends that I haven't talked to in a while saw me at church and told me that I looked beautiful. She said that's probably because God's doing something on the inside and it comes out on the outside. I don't FEEL that way at all! I was praying just now about how can I be beautiful when I feel so awful? Then God reminded me of a song. The chorus goes like this: "You called me beautiful when you saw my shame. And you put me on the wall anyway." The wall reference is because she is talking about being like a painting. God created it, of course He's going to call it beautiful! And He still says I'm beautiful, even when He sees my shame. And He wants to display me? I'm trying to believe Him, I really am.