Macaiah is the greatest person ever!

My brother is the coolest thing that walks this planet!
For Christmas he got me the best present I have ever gotten
But it wasn't the present itself
It's really true when they say it's the heart that counts
He got me a Killer shirt
number one, it shows that he knows me...I love The Killers!
number two, he bought it with his own money! It wasn't christmas money that my parents gave to him
number three, he was so happy to give it to me. He truly realized that to give is better than to receive
and number four, I got him a band shirt too: My Chemical Romance
that means we think alike =)
He's the best brother in the world
I want to hug him every chance I get
because I know someday soon he will be graduated, and knowing him he'll probably go to some out of state school, or worse, join the army
I want to cherish every single moment I have with him
I'm so glad that he's not just someone that will come in and out of my life
He's my little brother, I'm his older sister, and that's never gonna change

christmas eve.....

Merry Christmas!!!!

So far, christmas eve has been good.
but there is still much of the day left
plus tomorrow
BUT...
whatever happens it's gonna be okay
you know why?
because for the first time in my life I'm taking a chance
I'm moving out on my own
I'm risking everything
and trusting God
because He is everything

Take the vessel mold the clay
Lord I'm ready to obey
All I want I find in You
Lead me to You
I have nothing left to prove
I've come to the end and I need You
Nothing else can satisfy
Hear my cry
You are all that I need
You are my everything
You are the shoulder I lean on
You are my all in all
All my springs I find in You
All my dreams come true when I am with You
So take this broken vessel
Mold this earthen vessel
Till I'm whole and only filled by You

it is.....

SNOWING.....
AGAIN!!!

I'm so excited. I can't wait for tomorrow morning....maybe we'll go to point defiance
But I'm definitely finishing my christmas shopping!
which is not going to be a lot this year
moving out costs loads!!

by the way, if you read this consistenly, you should comment so I know who reads this. I'm not gonna lie, it kinda creeps me out (just a little) to think that someone could be stalking me!

I digress....
So if anyone wants to play in the snow tomorrow, give me a jingle! I'm up for anything!

finals week is finally over
and i'm too sick to care
i'm missing a piano lesson and swim team
and instead i layed on the couch all day after my french final
which i probably did sucky at
and i almost took nyquil, but i didn't really want to be drowsy all day
because i already am
but the feeling of not having to do ANYTHING today
is fantastic
and tomorrow all I have to do is work from 9:30 to 12:30
i'm way stoked
hopefully I'll get sleep tonight..................

my life is a contiunal circle!

what happened?

I used to be so secure
I realized at the christmas party that I'm not anymore

I was dressed up

but I felt like crap

Someone said "wow, you're not wearing jeans"

and I realized that my every day wear for awhile has been jeans and a sweatshirt

with a few varities

but then I thought "why do I care?"

day in and day out, I don't wear makeup, I don't dress up, I don't work hours on my hair

and I'm self confident

The day I dress up, I feel like I'm the lowest person on earth

why is that?

yep, that's me, oximoron

basically I'm a jumble of mixed feelings because I have had (on average) 4 or 5 hours of sleep every night for the past week

and my brain is not working right now

and I have to be up tomorrow at 6:30

it pretty much rocks my socks off

whoever's reading this, have a great day!

No Sugar???
Gag me please!

This is what my aparment is full of
but soon I will move out
junk food, here I freaking come!

it's pretty hard to do what God asks of me

It's getting harder and harder to give up the person God told me to give up
but what's the use of anything if it's not hard?
I don't want ANYTHING put on a silver platter and given to me
least of all a relationship
it's supposed to be challenging
am I up for the challenge?
well, the answer is in the bible
where is it that God says that He doesn't ask us to do what we can't do?
He gives us the strength to do what He's called us to do
big sigh of relief
I don't have to do it myself
God's on my side

dead week.....

It is officially dead week at PLU
and I can feel it
I need something relaxing
I need a run on the beach with Anna
I need a drive through Point Defiance with Sarah
oh wait, they're a million miles away

what I'm doing right now:
listening to the Garden State soundtrack
eating vietnamese food
attempting to procrastinate writing my french paper
and being addicted to blogging

the end

i love shopping when it's not my money

Today was shopping spree day. I had gift cards from claire's and sam goody for my birthday. I got these freakin sweet earings (among a few other nice jewelry)

And of course the Groban.

can this please end?

I'm hungry
but I have no energy to eat
I'm depressed
but I have no more tears left to cry
I'm stressed
but I have no desire to get everything done that is still left to do
I'm lonely
but I'm a million miles away from my Anna and Sarah

I wish I could curl up in a ball and forget that anyone else exists
I wish I could snap my fingers and flash foward to when I don't have school and I have a 'boy'
I wish there was something in my house I feel like eating

right now I'm going to go up to my room, blare my emo music (emery definitely), maybe cry a little, and then I think I'll have the energy to do my homework.

today was a stressful day (and it's not even close to being over with)
it didn't help that I got pissed yesterday because my friend didn't give me my key (long story)
it didn't help that the same friend came over and gave me my key, but we stayed up talking till 2 am and i had to be up at 5:30am
it didn't help that I got a whole 3 and a half hours of sleep last night
it didn't help that someone didn't show up for work this morning
it didn't help that the someone was head guard
it didn't help that I got yelled at for being angry about the situation
it didn't help that I double-booked myself today
it didn't help that it's hard for me to say no
it didn't help that I'm a pushover
it didn't help that I don't know who to make happy
it didn't help that last night I got pictures back from the summer, pictures of me and Sarah
it didn't help that there was no pictures of me and Anna in the 3 rolls of flim developed

okay, enough with the list
by the way, too many people see my myspace, so I'm probably lessening the amount of posts I put on there. they are too personal for the broad array of random people to read.

and the snow has melted

This would be the progression of the snow melting. The first was taken at around 8...the second at around 9. the progression was quick. so sad.

hi, i'm a lazy ass

So I decided that it was too snowy to go to school, even though classes weren't officially cancelled. so I decided to do this:
















And this:
















Yes, I love music and I love the snow...and I absolutely LOVE writing eight page religion papers while listening to music and watching the snow melt.